Everything Wrong with the CW

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(Photo Courtesy of Netflix, Photo credit to Ana Sallurday)

The CW logo that appears in the introduction of every TV show.

The CW network has a broad range of TV shows ranging from cross country superheroes to quirky detectives, but most of their shows lack diversity and relatable characters. Considering that these shows’ primary audience is teenagers, it’s weird that I, a teen, cannot finish any of these shows or relate to any character. Specifically, Riverdale, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, and The Flash are the ones that I have watched and found the most cringy. I think this is due to the writers’ ages which makes them touch with Gen Z. Most of the time, I find their cringy characters distracting from their broken storyline, which makes me want to stop watching TV. 

Riverdale: I don’t think there is a single teen out there who has been able to endure the 76 episodes. I remember Riverdale being that show everyone watched a couple of years ago, but now, it seems like no one watches it. I have to admit I did find the first season enjoyable to watch. It almost had a plotline, and nothing seemed super unreasonable, but it quickly became unwatchable when the plotlines became confusing and hard to understand. 

“I haven’t watched any of the new seasons, I think they should have stopped it after the first couple of seasons because it became less realistic and viewers weren’t engaged anymore,” said senior Brigitte Pinochet.

My favorite thing about Riverdale is that it started as a murder mystery to find out how her brother died, and it developed to revolve around a covenant that harvested organs. No, seriously. I don’t think any of the characters are relatable in any way. The characters are Cherry, a girl who might have a fetish with her brother; Veronica who is filthy rich; Archie, a jock who is good at singing; Jughead, a mysterious writer/detective who always wears a beanie; and Betty, the least dramatic character except that she is slowly becoming evil.  The saddest part is that they hired good actors who can act to play arguably the flattest TV characters ever created. We all grew up with Cole Sprouse’s memorable role of Cody on Suite Life of Zack and Cody, so we know he’s a good actor. I feel bad for the actors because they have to say dialogue that the writers think is teen lingo like “I’m cuckoo bananas for you, obvi.” No seriously. 

Yet again, The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina started out strong. Sabrina is a witch and has to choose between her long-term boyfriend and the witch school, but that’s almost too relatable and boring for the CW, so instead, she made a clone of herself so that she could partially rule hell while spending time with her new boyfriend who, by the way, was having affairs with sex demons. No, seriously. 

“I can’t describe the plot from any of the seasons, but I know it was lowkey always crazy for no reason. Crazier than it should be even though it’s about witchcraft,” said senior Kylie Roach.

My all-time favorite thing about this show is their random musicals. It feels like you’re watching a poor-quality music video in the middle of a TV show. At one point, her dad, aka Satan, is trapped inside her boyfriend, and while trying to find a spell to fix it, she stops to have a music video to a Tik Tok song, It’s Tricky.” No, seriously. There are two music videos in one episode. I think I am more upset that Ross Lynch, who plays Harvey Kinkle, wasn’t in the first music video considering we grew up with him singing on Austin and Allie, a Disney TV show that revolved around music.   

“The writing, in particular, was so weird to me. The characters would say lines and I remember being so confused as to who thought it was a good idea to put that in. The writing made plots and scenes feel messy because of how poorly they were written,” said  Roach.  

I don’t think The Flash is as poorly written as the other TV shows because the episodes don’t get bad until several seasons into the show. Their superhero TV shows are their best content, by far, because the unrealistic plotlines work best when writers can blame plot holes on superpowers. The Flash also had a musical in it, but it fits with the plot of the episode better, and it was an original song. The problem starts when Barry and Iris’ daughter time travels to meet them and messes everything up by creating problems in the wrong timeline. I don’t remember much about their daughter other than she was so annoying. 

“I rate The Flash 7/10 because I found the plotlines entertaining,” said senior Grace Campbell.

The CW has plenty of room for improvement, but I don’t think they will change how they write their TV shows anytime soon because these trends are in all their TV shows. They need younger writers who know more of the teen lingo or don’t attempt to speak like teens. Maybe the new writers will also know how to create a storyline worth a couple of seasons rather than getting a new plot every season. I would enjoy the TV shows more if I could comprehend what the storyline is after three seasons. No, seriously.