What’s the Difference?


Photo courtesy of Allie Weber, photo credits to MissRemiAshten- FAT vs SKINNY

There is no difference in the way Remi Ashten acts, and yet she is receiving a large amount of viewers because her action are quote “Slutty.” (Photo courtesy of Allie Weber, photo credits to MissRemiAshten- FAT vs SKINNY)

Society’s perception of a public figure is based off of two things: reality and rumors. Gossip, at least the majority of the time, spreads vulgar rumors that do nothing but harm the person in the spotlight. While known for its positive effects, weight loss can be associated with the risqué rumors and taunts that haunt the comments on social media.  This dramatic and life-changing event leads to whispers as to why this person changed, but also comments that corrupt the victim’s good intentions.

“I can completely change myself when people are telling me to change myself, and then they’re going to find something else to hate on,” said YouTuber Remi Ashten in her video, “Fat vs Skinny.”

We as humans are all created differently, with hundreds of diverse features, both physical and mental. So, with different body types and personalities, what’s the point in the double standards of beauty, both physical and mental? Recently, life-style and beauty vlogger, Remi Ashten, lost a significant amount of weight, and captured the entire experience for her 2.4 some-odd million subscribers. As a viewer, I did not notice the hate she was given until after her weight plateaued. Vulgar comments such as “Sl*t” and “P*rn Star” were commented on her YouTube videos and Instagram posts of her doing the exact same things she did before she lost the weight. She is wearing the same clothes, doing the same dance moves, and everyday things. The question then arose in my head, “What’s the difference?” She had changed nothing but her appearance and her hate immediately changed from “Lose Weight” to “Stop Being Slutty.”

“Now all of a sudden because I have a different body type, I’m suddenly a slut,” said YouTuber Remi Ashten on her podcast “Pretty Basic” with Alisha Marie.

Due to the comments, Remi posted a remake of one of Alissa Violet’s (YouTuber and model) Instagram photos simply to see what the comments would be; and of course, they were gross, inhumane remarks that one could not imagine saying directly to her face. Comments such as, “Literally just do porn. You’ll get the male attention you are apparently so desperate for,” whereas on Alissa’s photo, they were positive, uplifting comments, admiring how beautiful she is. This, to me, makes no sense. Just because Alissa has been known on the internet as a model, she can post these pictures without a second thought or ramifications. Remi, however, has been known on the internet as heavier than she is now, and because of this, she receives negative feedback and is seen to be grasping for male attention. In actuality, she started her weight loss journey and health kick all for herself. So what is the difference? These two, beautiful, young women are both in shape, both have similar personalities, and both have almost identical careers, yet just because one has been known in a different way in a different chapter of her life, she is treated without decency.

“I had this moment 15 times, everytime I tried a diet, I’d wake up I’d be like I’m doing it, I’m doing it. Finally I just woke up, and was like “I’m going to do this for me”, said Remi.

The final question is why? Why is it acceptable for one person to do something, but completely outrageous for another to do the exact same thing? I believe that this question can never fully be answered without follow up questioning their reasoning. As humans, we put each other in boxes, with the things we associate them with. However, when that person steps out of their assigned box, we unintentionally or intentionally attempt to put them back in their place, whether that be through constructive criticism, or sadly, mean comments.

“I think it’s like people put me in a box in their brain of not being able to look or act a certain way, and it’s not accepted,” said Remi in her YouTube video “Fat vs Skinny.”

We need to realize that people are subject to change, regardless of their purpose, intention, or end result. Expecting someone, especially someone who works in the spotlight, to never change is unrealistic. Their surroundings are changing, and they are adapting along with them. As a whole, we should get rid of the tiny boxes and understand that when a person changes, they are learning and growing, whether it be about their surroundings, their lives, or themselves.